 |
| Not my image, credited to Julie Tillery from Facebook |
2013 saw me, for a time, have a crisis of faith which haunts me. I literally looked at my life, the devastation and destruction in it, and I witnessed the person I thought was the strongest Christian I knew walk away from his faith, so in anger I said, "If this is what being on God's team brings, I don't want to play anymore!" I was selfish and wanted to take MY toys and go home. It was wrong, I sinned - there is NO excuse. I walked blindly through life for a while, without His light. I know He was still there watching over me, but I was stumbling, falling and crawling on skinned knees without him. But like a child, I have come seeking the direction and hand of my Father and feeling His forgiveness. The difference is, I feel like a baby now...having to learn to walk, talk and do most everything. I am a baby in Christ right now, learning to pray, to seek His Word, to try to stay within his Will in Everything. The above image is not my own, I saw it on Facebook and it spoke to me about the coming year....2014. I am going to trust Him and His plan...knowing it is wonderful, knowing He thinks I am beautiful when others don't, knowing He loves me when others don't, knowing He cares what happens when others don't. I am seeking His in 2014.
I know there will be pain in 2014 and in all honesty, I am struggling mightily with temptation as I enter this new year. I am struggling against myself a great deal and fear is a constant battle. But, I am determined to keep trying, to keep seeking my Savior.
May you experience blessings and joy in 2014.
