I have to admit, this year I have had a hard time finding my groove in being thankful. Most of that is my own selfishness. I know I have more than I could ever count to be thankful for...but this has been a hard year. I have lost a great deal...my life as I knew it, my children's lives as they knew it and love I thought was for a life time. I have had to come to terms with the ugly realities of betrayals and the shock of realizing you don't always know the people you are most vulnerable with. I have had to begin wrapping my mind around a reality that the last 30 years of my life were not what they seemed and only a mirage. So, I find myself stunned often by those realities and they make me overlook what I should be thankful for.
Each year on the blog I try to post about what I am thankful for, and this year it is taking more thought, more consideration than usual. I haven't spent the month of November documenting the special blessings in my life as in the past; but there have been blessings. I have 3 jobs (yes, 3 part time jobs!) that I like which have come just when they needed to, I have a warm, safe house, a car that is reliable and most importantly I have 3 amazing children to share my journey with. I know if it had not been for their presence in my life I would not still be standing. They each have unique strengths and talents and bring different joys into my life. I am waiting expectantly to see just what God does in their lives in the coming seasons, because I know in my heart He has big plans for them. He would not take them through what they have faced if He didn't have BIG plans for them. I can't wait to stand on the side lines and cheer them through their lives.
I also have many dear, special friends to be thankful for, some old and some new. I wish I could tell you what each one has brought into my world this year but it would take days to write each blessing down. I am just thankful for their love, support and help.
I am also thankful for my parents and their support this year. It was a painful year of loss for them as well but they did all they could to help me and the children. I am blessed.
It is a different year...this 2014. Holidays won't be the same and our family is learning to be a family...just a smaller one...but we are blessed. Thank you, Lord.