New Steps, New Life...

 

2,557 days ago, exactly 7 years ago, I stepped out in faith and walked into a new life.  It would be wonderful to say I had a grand plan, direction, or purpose, but I did not.  Literally, I was walking blindly from the world’s and even my own perspective.  I  looked into the faces of my sons and said where do you want to live, and they chose to return to our previous town.  I had no where to live, no job …just a car full of stuff, 2 amazing boys, and a dog.  The only thing I knew is who we were spending the night with and where the boys were to report to school the next day.  It now, quite literally, seems insane.  But, like many things we think to be insane, God was at work.  Although I will never understand His tactics, I do trust His plan.  I know I have not always, I have doubted, I have denied, I have fought against, but ultimately it is all His plan and there is a peace in that.

Peace is something that does not come naturally to me.  I am an anxious person …a worrier, an over thinker, a mind racer, scenario creator, all dripping with a terribly wild imagination.  But, finally, there are things that I have peace about. Issues I never thought I would lay to rest because I did not understand them or didn’t know “why.”  Peace came when I realized it does not matter. I do not have to know “why” and there are things I will never understand.  God gets it – ALL.  He knows “why” and He understands.

“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33

BUSY...the word that will no longer be used...A Rant

Busy, is a word I have come to despise...whether someone else uses it or I use it.  I  realize we have culturally morphed this word from what was once a word people used to describe an activity that was unavoidable (i.e. work, an event, etc.) to a word that we use to avoid doing things we don't want to do.  Yes, there are times when we are legitimately "busy," but there are a heck of a lot of times when we use it as an excuse to avoid doing things we don't want to do.  Ultimately, I have learned that people find time to do the things and see the people who are truly important to them...no matter how "busy" they are.

So, I guess I have grown weary of hearing it as an excuse for bad or rude behavior. "I am so sorry I didn't call you back, I have been so BUSY!"  "Oh, I miss you and we really need to catch up, I have just been so BUSY."  "We will get together when things aren't so BUSY."  Yes, I am guilty of using these same excuses and honestly when I think about the big picture they were/are just excuses.  It made my lack of availability or interest sound valid.  As a culture we like to think busy makes us sound important and productive but as the saying goes, chaos does not equal productivity.

Also, it comes down to what is important to you and waving away a friend or family member because you are "busy" is just bogus.  We all know how to make time for those who we really want to spend time with.  It is all about choices.  Sadly, I think our world is continuing to isolate socially and the word busy has helped it along.

Now, I know that some people feel overwhelmed and so "busy" that they have no time for anyone or anything but what makes your "busy" more significant than my "busy?"  When a friend says to me, "Oh I have been so busy that I couldn't get back to you,"... barring a true emergency or an unique season of life, I have finally come to the conclusion I don't want/need to work that hard.   See, I am a single Mom, who works a demanding full time job, is involved in Bible Studies at my church, and several community organizations, not to mention keeping a household running...but I will still make time.  But, I am learning to protect my time so I have the time to make.  I am also learning that those who are always too "busy" aren't finding a place on my calendar...not because I am too busy but because time is precious and I don't want to chase people down to spend time with them.

When asked,  "How was your day?" I no longer say, "Busy."  I say full.  Yes, this is some what of a rant but I think we all need to determine are we really busy or are we just choosing to invest our time elsewhere and are we choosing wisely?

Today

My prayer for today.  Though, I fail and fall again and again....I still have hope in Him.  

Seeking Hope.

Downtown

One night last week, one of my boys and I took a walk downtown. It reminded me of how much I love our downtown. I love to shop, dine and generally spend time there. Yes, my town has a true downtown square that is still thriving with businesses, cafes, nightlife and beauty. That is rare today but because of the scarcity of such, I love it even more. I know that my children experience something there than most people (especially their ages) will never know.

It is lovely in the early morning when it is still quiet and nothing has opened yet. It is lively and exciting during the day when it is busy with shoppers and business people having lunches and meetings. It is relaxing in the evening when the sun is setting and it is quiet again and you only hear the strains of conversations from benches in the park and out door tables at the local restaurants and cafes. It is wonderful after dark, when strains of music come from the clubs and the lights give it a romantic atmosphere. Just last night my DH and I left an event downtown at almost 11:00 p.m. and it was just so comforting to see the lights and enjoy the peace and safety of our downtown as we walked away.

The merchants downtown work very hard to keep the square a wonderful place. They host many events through out the year to draw in the community and remind people that there is more to a town than the mall and BestBuy! One of our favorites is Brunch with the Bunny which comes the Saturday before Easter and finishes off with an Easter Egg Hunt on the square…then there is the wonderful Thursday nights leading up to Christmas when all the shops stay open late and Santa rides around in a horse drawn carriage. I love downtown.